March 21: For the longest time

So, remember the slightly self-righteous, overly enthusiastic way I ended my last post? Well, pride goeth before a fall. Life has a way of making you check yourself. After my last post, dental issues started creeping up; an abscessed molar due to an incomplete root canal (which was started my first week or so of boot camp) put me out of commission for two whole working days, and then the subsequent visits to the dentist equipped me with this sense of self-pampering which made me skip one class, then the next, then the next one......until I found myself looking at the calendar, fully intending on going back to class on March 19. But then what happened? Root canal. Was impossible to go to boot camp after that. Wednesday came, and I almost didn't go - Dad called and said that my uncle was in town - but I firmly told him (and myself) that if I didn't go back that night, I would regret it.

Wednesday, just to prepare to return after the longest hiatus since I started, I helped myself to a second cup of the office coffee (espresso strength) in the afternoon, accompanied by tons of water. When I walked in, the new receptionist looked surprised as I initialed by my name. In the pup tent, as various people walked in, they looked surprised to see me and asked me if I had been away. "Nope." I then went on to explain the dental issues. The rest, chalked up to laziness.

Before the DIs even called for us to start our laps, one highly ambitious recruit started running around the gym. Ironically enough, this was a woman who, just a few weeks back, had trouble even wearing her uniform. But it didn't strike me as inspired as much as it seemed like she was just trying to seem better than the other recruits. Call it my early impressions of her sticking in my mind. Finished with those, into group stretches. Would you believe, when it came time to do a butterfly stretch, instead of pushing my partner's knees down as they sat Indian style, I forgot and pushed down on her back. I quickly realized my mistake and corrected myself. Not without Titus noticing, of course, and he grinned momentarily and said, "Good job Vincent." Color me embarrassed.

Started off with 75 jumping jacks - managed those well enough. Next, 15 push-ups, to their count. Collectively, people had a bit of trouble with the first couple because people didn't understand that they had to shout out the number when they went down, not as they came back up; we got it together eventually. Followed by 20 squat thrusts - I made it to 16/17 (I think Alex noticed, but he didn't call me out on it). Back to 25 jumping jacks, this time a bit more of a challenge, the sweat started to trickle down my forehead. 15 more squat thrusts - started to get painful, and the 'Judy looking like a frog' syndrome started to kick in. The next 15 push-ups were definitely tougher, and I looked over to find the woman next to me (more of a newbie) doing them in the non-girly way. Fine, I am making NO progress, am merely thankful to be able to get through. On our backs for leg lifts - 30 of them, and to make things tougher, Titus called out for us to get our heads and shoulder blades off the ground - ugh. I can't say I held my head up for all of them, but made my best effort. And when we finished the leg lifts, we were ordered to hold our legs 6 inches off the ground for a count of 20. Titus walked up to me and pushed my legs closer to the ground (definitely was lower than 6 inches), and I KNOW he saw the tensed-up, gritted-teeth rictus of pain/determination I had on my face, and heard the strain in my voice as I counted backwards to 1. Then, 12 seconds to get around the gym.

Back to the PT area, high knees for a count of 20, then time for 15 star jumpers - made tougher by Alex pushing me further down into a sitting position. Immediately followed by 20 jumping lunges. My legs started to feel progressively stiffer and heavier, so I didn't lunge as deeply as I normally would. Drop down to push up position, into 20 reps of feet-together-feet-apart. (Note: having had 4 inches of my hair cut off recently, my ponytail was NOT staying in place, and periodically caused me to try and blow my bangs out of my face.)

The last part of the warm-up was challenging in a new way. After the previous exercise, we were ordered to hold in push-up position, and then raise our left arms for a count of 25. Then our right arms, then the left leg, and then the right leg. And then we all did the hokey pokey and turned ourselves around - kidding. If that wasn't tough enough, back to push up position, and then were made to raise our left arm AND right leg (Alex happened to be passing by me and decided to pull my leg - literally). Then, switch it up - and the right-arm-left-leg up for a count of 25. Finally, the last 12 seconds to get around the gym. WHEW.

We were divided up into squads; Alex was overseeing mine (purrrrrr). We were brought over to behind the INTENSITY wall, where we were given our first exercise - tire sit-ups, where you were partnered up, and as you came up, had to punch left-right-left-right, and that was one rep. 100 of those. Fortunately, I was paired up with a woman who hadn't been back for a long time as well. So we focused on pacing ourselves - I'll admit, I didn't do the full 100; I did rest a couple of times when she kept on motoring through. Having completed that task, we were allowed a water break - thank god.

We lined up in front of Alex, and he explained what we were to do next - we were going to partner up and do the obstacle course, but in between each obstacle, we were to do 15 star jumpers. (Note: with this in mind, I will skip over the obvious repetitive mention of the star jumpers, in the interest of brevity) Over the first set of hurdles, into the rope net; my partner was motoring waaay ahead of me until Alex told her that she had to wait for me. Over the second set of hurdles, then we paused, having a collective brain fart, wondering if we had to do the star jumpers. Titus, even though he wasn't directing our squad, flexed his muscles and threatened us with knuckle sandwiches if we didn't get a move on. Over the walls, then to the monkey bars. I thought I wouldn't be able to make it, but with the help of my partner spotting me the whole way through, I got across - YAY. The next obstacle was the climbing wall - which was ludicrous in my eyes, because honestly, it wasn't built for people with limbs as short as mine. I attempted to protest to Alex, but he said, "Bullsh*t, Vincent, I've seen you do this, so get up there." I told him he was confused with another short Indian recruit. He smirked and jerked his chin towards the wall.

I made it across part of the wall, and then did a wall squat as I waited for my partner to get over the log belly rollers. Alex saw me waiting, walked over with his usual Alex manly-man swagger, and said, "Vincent, did you get around that wall, or did you cheese d*ck it?" Shocked, I busted out laughing, and managed to sputter, "Alex, what does that mean?" He grinned his boyish grin, and walked away for a minute. When he came back to get ready to help me up onto the logs, I looked at him and demanded that he tell me what it meant, otherwise I would use it in polite company. He looked a bit sheepish, and said, "You know, cheese d*ck, it means, did you bullsh*t it......" I thought it was the best phrase I had ever heard, and vowed to use it on my juniors (when the opportunity presented itself). But when I got over the log rollers and was preparing to get up the INTENSITY wall, Alex said it was time to switch things up - he denied me the wall!!! Dammit!!

Over in the PT area, Wong instructed us to grab a green bar, and then go into a lap of lunges paired up with a bicep curl. Now, normally these are easy for me, but halfway around, they got tougher - probably due to the long hiatus. Back to Wong - we were to do 30 bicep curls, 30 squat/lifts, and then 30 overhead curls. As I was going through my reps, Wong walked up and down the line, and decided to punch me in the stomach to check my form - argh. We rounded out the exercises with another 30 bicep curls - that was all I could manage in the time allotted - I quickly finished them and headed over to the rock wall. We did our 20, and then class was done.

I was definitely happy that I made it through, and learned a new phrase to boot.